I Failed at My Writing Retreat

Photo by Zuzana Kacerová on Unsplash

I spent the last two weeks away from home. The first week I was still doing some work, and spending time with family, and got in a break in the Adirondacks at the place where my family has gone for several generations now. I squeezed in some kayaking, some hiking, a lot of eating, and a little reading. No writing, except for journaling, but that was fine.  

I’d planned to spend the second week on a writing retreat at a friend’s cabin in Vermont. For various reasons, it didn’t work out quite as planned – I arrived a day later than I’d expected; there was a fair amount of coming and going (though I was thrilled to actually be able to spend time with my friend vs. merely inhabiting her house and serving her two adorable kitty mistresses of the domain).   

I did have a couple of days of solitude, where I was able to focus more on writing. But altogether, I didn’t make a ton of progress on my novel revisions. Word count? I dunno, maybe 5K? Maybe less. I didn’t keep track. I completed a couple of chapters.  

But – I got some clarity on the story itself, and what needs to happen next. As any writer knows, that glimpse into the murky darkness is a ray of starlight that shows the way forward, even a little. I’ll take it.  

I also got clarity on, Yes, I want to write this book. That in itself is huge. I’m about at the midpoint, AKA the Messy Middle, when I start to lament that I wasn’t gifted with the urge to write poetry – haiku, limericks, anything other than novels that stretch to hundreds of pages, tens of thousands of words. And then I remember poetry isn’t easier, just shorter, and I go back to grinding my teeth and pacing around and putting words on the page until something makes sense.  

A lack of focus and planning definitely influenced me. I always say if you are doing any kind of writing retreat, it helps to have a clear idea of what you want to accomplish.  

Have a focus – an idea of what you want to work on. This could be novel chapters, a series of poems, fun writing exercises drawn at random, revising that long essay...  

Have a goal - an ambitious word goal, perhaps. A poem a day. A certain number of hours spent writing (to go deep, to let your mind sink into words). 

Have discipline - I was just winging it from the beginning, so I lacked the discipline to keep a sacred writing time.  

All of that said, I’m not beating myself up over my “failure.” It is what it is. I jump-started my story again, I have a clearer path forward, and I wrote a couple of chapters. The biggest Rule of any writing retreat is:  

CELEBRATE AND SAVOR YOUR WINS. 

Any time we get too rigid about our writing, about how it should go or what we should be doing, it makes our creativity shrink and harden like those Shrinky-Dinks we used to make back in the day (anyone remember those? Does anyone still do them?). 

Let your creativity flow like water. Think of it like a river you can step into anytime, that can flow around any obstacles in its path, or wear them down with gentle persistence. Embrace the experience of the moment. Let whatever is happening fill your well, so that you come to the writing full and eager to share your bounty.