Distraction or Discipline: Which Do You Choose?
I follow Brendon Burchard on Instagram and Twitter (@BrendonBurchard). He’s a coach in the inspirational/productivity space and he gives good doses of loving but firm advice. A couple of his recent quotes struck me in particular, since they hit hard at a daily struggle I and many writers and creators go through:
"Please do not pretend to be perplexed about the state of your progress in life. Distraction or Discipline. One is winning. That is all the explanation needed."
"Few people realize that at the base of their issues with DISTRACTION is an issue of TRUST. They don’t trust themselves or their path or a higher purpose so they are always unmoored and will latch onto the next shiny thing."
How many of us fall prey to distraction, when we know we have an intention to work on something more meaningful to us? Quite a few, I imagine. Nothing like the prospect of sitting down to a difficult scene to make us suddenly remember the dishes that need washing, or that funny email from Aunt Hilda we need to reply to, or the latest blog or podcast by our favorite writer we absolutely must catch up on… and that crossword isn’t going to solve itself.
More than ever, life is full of distractions. We make resolutions to not let ourselves fall into the distraction trap. We leave our phone in the other room, we use an app to prevent us from accessing the internet, and still… we find more distractions. Not every day. Not all the time. We might manage to get just enough work done to convince ourselves we’re fine, that the distractions aren’t affecting us that much. And besides, the dishes do need to get done. We do need to check in with Aunt Hilda. That podcast is interesting and useful. The human mind is terrific at justifications for our beliefs and behaviors.
The thing is, the distractions aren’t going away. They will always be there. Ubiquitous, their siren calls deafening. We have to find ways to manage them, to choose Discipline.
It can be helpful to simply make a habit of checking in every time you start an activity: Is this real work, or is it a distraction? At least, if you are choosing Distraction, make it a conscious choice. You can also get a time tracker app and log your time doing every activity, for every minute of the day, for a week and see what happens. Chances are, it will be a wake-up call as to how many hours you are really spending on Distraction, and how much on the work you say you want to do.
Not that Distraction activities are bad. Sometimes we do need a break, and something mindless can fit the bill nicely. However, it is very easy to spend more time on Distraction activities than you thought. Just yesterday I opened up my computer to check email in between two work sessions. I expected to spend 20-30 minutes. Two hours later, I got up, annoyed at myself and wondering where the time went. My favorite trick is to set a timer for my intended time for a Distraction activity. When it goes off, I move on to the next thing. Or at least, if I continue what I’m doing, I am forced to acknowledge it: I am choosing to scroll Twitter right now instead of write.
The second quote helps us understand WHY Distraction is so hard to overcome. It’s not that we’re lazy. It’s not just that we prefer the easy (and hopefully fun) to hard work. I like framing it as an issue of trust rather than fear. As writers and creatives, we might have a lot of fears: that we won’t be able to translate the beautiful Thing in our heads to a beautiful Thing in the world; that other people will hate our work, or ignore it; that on whatever level, we just won’t succeed.
Yes, fear can paralyze us if we let it, but that is where trust comes in. Feel the fear and do it anyway, trusting that the work is important, and that it will come. We have to trust our vision, and the process, however messy it may be. We have to do the work, aiming for the desired outcome but not attached to it. We have to cultivate an air of curiosity and play, even as we’re serious about doing the work itself.
Writers especially are prone to Shiny Next Book syndrome. This one is going poorly. I’m really struggling here. But wait! I have a great idea – for the NEXT book! Maybe I should write that one instead… And so they jump to the new story, promising themselves they’ll get back to this one, once they’ve figured it all out.
For some people it works well to have several projects going at once. For others, Shiny Next Book syndrome becomes a way to avoid doing the hard work in the messy middle.
TRUST THE PROCESS.
The thing is, we have to learn this lesson over and over again. At least I do. I always want to find a shortcut to avoid the process, to make it less messy, easier, more of a sure path to perfection. I always have to remind myself to trust the process, trust my love of writing, trust that I have something interesting and important to say. Sometimes, it’s simply trusting that I can find my way through this next chapter, however stuck I feel at the moment. The process of sitting down, engaging with the work, that is what’s important.
To do this, I go back to basics: write for 15 minutes. Someone the other day suggested writing just 50 words. It’s almost impossible to write just 50 words; you’re virtually guaranteed to keep going, for at least a few hundred. Let one thought lead to the next, and the next. Don’t worry too much if it makes sense or is “good.” That’s the process. Even better, it’s almost distraction-proof. Even I can tell myself Candy Crush can wait until I’ve written 50 words, or the laundry can wait 15 minutes.
The thing is, we have to stop conceiving of Discipline as driven by willpower. We have to see it as a conscious choice, like choosing love over hate. Or choosing broccoli over French fries. While we might indulge in French Fries once in a while because they taste good, we know that ultimately broccoli will make us feel better, physically and mentally. Once you understand that eating broccoli feels better than eating junk, or exercising feels better than being a couch potato, you WANT to eat healthier and exercise. Same with discipline. You know you feel better when you are accomplishing the things you say you want to do, so trust that feeling! Think of it every time you make the choice: Distraction or Discipline?
